Undesired Help
by Brooke47
Summary: To say Emma Swan is a troubled girl is an understatement. She has been to hell and back and she's only seventeen. She's seen and felt so much pain in her years in the foster system and she loathes it. She doesn't want to accept her feelings. But it all changes when she meets her new social worker appointed therapist, Regina Mills. AU. Swan Queen.
1. The Doctor

Undesired Help – Chapter 1 – The Doctor

**A/N: Yes, I know I have Everything She Wants in process now, but this story will not affect that one, or vice versa. This story may get a little dark, so you have been warned. I hope you enjoy this! Also, I do not own any of the characters.**

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><p>Emma said goodbye to her happiness a long time ago. She knew she could never be happy, not when her parents clearly didn't want her to. Why else would they just dump her on the side of freeway? She thought about going against her parent's wishes a long time ago, but it was pointless. This is the life they had given her when they abandoned her.<p>

She was tired of her new life, tired of fighting over food, tired of fighting for herself. She was just exhausted. That's why she was sitting on the edge of a very secluded bridge. Contemplating her life. The wind was strong and cold, but she didn't care. Maybe there was blissfulness in death that she couldn't find in life. She knew the odds of that being true were slim to none, but she didn't have any other choices. Her life sucked.

"Emma." She heard a voice call out to her, but she ignored it, looking down at the raging waters, sixty feet beneath her.

It started to rain very heavily. She was glad for that. It made it easier to tune out the voice that was calling for her. It also made it easier for her to hide her now streaming tears.

"What are you doing here, Neal?" She shouted over the rain, finally giving into the persistence of her foster-brother.

Neal was more like her brother than any of the other kids that were in her household. She considered him family. She hated the fact that he knew who she really was. He knew her better than she even knew herself. He was the only family she had; he was the reason she hadn't jumped yet.

"You know why I'm here, Emma." The boy replied.

Emma scoffed. "To stop me? Why?" She asked.

"Come down and I'll tell you." He answered.

Emma grumbled something inaudible and reluctantly climbed down, almost slipping before she made it to the bottom. Neal hugged her and his quiet sobs could be heard.

"I'm still going back up there, Neal. I just don't feel like shouting." She said, pulling away from her brother. "Now tell me why you're here." She added, looking him straight in the eyes.

"I followed you here. I want you to get help Emma." She glared at him before he put his hands up defensively. "Hear me out before you get pissed. I know life in the system is shitty, but one more year and we'll be out of it, Ems. I know how hard it is, especially for you, but you have to talk to someone, Emma. I can't lose you. You're the only family I have." He practically whispered the last part.

"Who could I go to for help, Neal? Who's going to help me?" The blonde cried as she fell to the ground, feeling completely broken beyond hope.

Neal knelt next to her and embraced her, holding her while she let out all of her bottled up emotions. "I know someone who can help you." He stated easily. "Come on."

With that Emma got up and unwillingly followed her brother to wherever it was he was taking her. They reached what she recognized as the building where everyone from social services worked. She would remember this building for the rest of her life. It's where they dropped her off when they didn't want her anymore. She's seen this building more times than she could care to count.

"Really, Neal? This is the last place I want to be." She stated, looking up at the building she resented.

"We're going to talk to your social worker; she'll get someone to talk to you as soon as possible. A therapist." Neal explained, expecting defiance.

"Are you fucking serious, Neal? A therapist? This is bullshit. He's not going to care; he'll just put me on medication that we can't afford. This is a waste of time, Neal, and you know it." Yup there was the defiance.

"Just give it a chance; people wouldn't be therapists if they didn't want to help." Neal pleaded.

Emma sighed. "Fine, lead the way."

Neal smiled and led her to an elevator and quickly pressed the floor to take them to the third floor. As soon as the elevator sounded, letting them know they were on the requested floor, Neal stepped out with Emma following behind him.

He knocked on the social workers door, Sidney Glass was his name. Emma forgot how much she hated the man.

"Ah, Emma, another family returning you?" He asked coldly.

Emma scowled and would've punched if Neal hadn't been there to hold her hand, keeping her grounded. So instead she smiled at him.

"No, I'd like to see a therapist." She said through gritted teeth.

Sidney looked surprised, he'd seen a lot from Emma, but he had never seen her ask for help before. He motioned for her to enter his office.

"Please, have a seat. There are two therapists in Storybrooke who are more than willing to take on another patient, now tell me, would you be more comfortable seeing a female or a male therapist?" He asked, ruffling around the papers on his desk looking for patient applications.

"A female, most definitely." She answered, knowing that she wouldn't be able to open up to male, even if he was a doctor, she had a very difficult time trusting men, and with good reason.

"Right." Sidney stated simply, "I just need you to fill in these papers." He said, handing her the request forms.

"Alright." She quickly filled in all of her information and signed on the dotted line, feeling like she was signing her life away.

She handed the papers back to Mister Glass and he faxed them over to the therapist's office right away. "Okay Miss Swan, if you head upstairs to the fourth floor, make a left, the third door on your right will be Doctor Mills' office will be right there." He explained.

He got up to lead them out of the room and was still pleasantly surprised that Emma Swan had come in to get help. He smiled to himself, silently gloating that he would be the one to indirectly help a lost girl.

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><p><strong>AN: Okay, so that's it for the first chapter! Next chapter we'll be meeting Doctor Mills. Ha! That should be fun. I really do hope you guys like this so please review and let me know! And we will be delving into Emma's past, which is a very rocky road. Please review! It would really mean a lot to me.**


	2. First Session

Undesired Help – Chapter 2 – First Session

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><p>Emma walked up to the third door on her left after exiting the elevator with Neal in tow. How had she let him talk her into this? To say she was nervous is an understatement, she knew she could do this, she was just doing it for Neal, and more or less for herself, knowing that it would get Neal off her back for the time being.<p>

She opened the door with an obnoxious amount of hesitation to find a rather young woman sitting behind a desk. She was beautiful, Emma noticed right away, she had perfect chocolate-brown eyes, dark brunette hair that could be mistaken for black if she hadn't looked close enough, and her lips had the most adorable pout permanently plastered there. Emma blushed when she realized her eyes must have lingered on the woman's body for too long when Neal nudged her.

The woman looked up. "Miss Swan, I presume?" She asked, studying the younger girl's features.

Emma couldn't even form a coherent thought, so she didn't dare try speaking; she just nodded and attempted a smile, failing miserably.

"And is this young man your boyfriend?" She asked casually.

Neal laughed at that. "No, I'm not really her type." With an elbow to the gut from Emma, he clarified, "I'm her brother." He stated.

Regina almost smiled at that. "I'm Doctor Regina Mills." She introduced herself. "Is he going to be staying with us for our first session?" The older woman asked.

Emma shook her head, "No, um, is there somewhere he could wait for me?" She asked, finally finding words.

"Yes, there is a waiting room just down the hall." She directed the young man standing in front of her.

Neal smiled and squeezed Emma's shoulder as a sign of support. Emma sent back a fake smile in thanks.

As soon as the door closed, Regina spoke up. "Do you do that a lot?" she asked, when she got a confused expression, she elaborated, "Fake smiles to please those around you, dear." She said gesturing for Emma to sit down on the couch across from her desk.

The blonde shrugged, "not really, I only do it for people I care about, and the only person I care about is Neal. He's the only family I have." She explained, avoiding eye contact with the doctor.

"I see. So, tell me about yourself, Emma. What made you request for urgent treatment after all these years?" She asked, staring intently at the young blonde.

Emma slightly faltered, but quickly regained herself, "Neal followed me to this old, abandoned bridge a few hours ago." She stopped and finally looked back up at Regina, seeing nothing but understanding and comfort in her eyes, she trusted this woman, she didn't know why, but she felt like she could bear her soul to her and get no judgement in return, so she continued, "I was going to…" Her breath hitched in her throat as the realization of what exactly she was going to do on that bridge hit her like a big yellow school bus; she cleared her throat and continued, "I went there to kill myself." She finally concluded, with a bitter, hoarse voice.

The doctor's eyebrows furrowed as she stepped out from behind her desk and sat down on the black leather couch next to Emma. "Why?" She simply asked.

Emma allowed a silent tear to slide down her left cheek, "Because I don't have a reason to live." She stated sadly but honestly to the doctor sitting next to her.

"You simply haven't found one yet, dear." The older brunette stated, sending Emma a sad but reassuring smile.

"Will you help me find one?" She asked dumbly in her extremely vulnerable state.

She didn't understand why she had asked, but she was silently hoping with all of her heart that this woman would give her a reason to want to live again, to want to feel alive.

"I promise you, I will do my best, Miss Swan." She said, smiling at the broken girl sitting beside her.

Something flashed in Emma's eyes, it was gone as quick as it came, but for a second there, Regina could have sworn she seen hope.

"You can call me Emma, you know." Emma joked.

"Of course, dear." Regina smiled and got up to go to her desk when Emma grabbed her hand, startling her; she quickly turned around and looked Emma in the eyes.

"Thank you, Regina." The blonde said graciously.

"I'm just doing my job, Miss- Emma." She indicated, not caring that their hands were still clasped together.

Emma released the older woman's hand and her face immediately hardened, Regina found herself missing the warmth of another person. How long had it been since someone touched her, even in the most innocent way possible? Five years? Six?

"Right. Your job." Emma whispered, as if she was reminding herself more than anything.

Regina recognized the look of disappointment on the younger girl's features and immediately realized her poorly chosen words. "Emma, it's not like that. I'm not just helping you because of my job; I'm helping you because it's what I want to do." She desperately explained.

Emma looked up at her and knew she was telling the truth, she always had that ability, after years and years of being lied to and manipulated, she finally knew how to notice the signs of dishonestly. Her mask came down and she was back to the same expression she had worn just moments ago.

"So how long have you been a therapist?" Emma asked, her curiosity taking over.

Regina stiffened. "I'm uh; I'm actually not technically a therapist… yet." She admitted, upon seeing the younger girl's confusion, she continued, "I'm working towards my doctorate." She explained.

"Wait, so this is all just gonna be in some report? My life, is just going to be your class project?" It was more of a statement than a question. Emma was starting to get angry.

Regina didn't want to lie to her, she got the feeling that she wouldn't be able to even if she tried. "Yes, but don't worry, all the names mentioned will be changed for privacy and confidence, but I really am here to help, Emma. I promise" She said, smiling at the younger girl.

Emma released a breath she didn't know she was holding. "So when do we meet next?" She asked, clearly ready for this overwhelming session to be over.

Regina didn't need to check her schedule to know that she had the rest of the year free, "How about in three days' time? And if you need me before then, I'll give you my personal number, just in case it's late at night and you need someone to talk to." Regina smiled.

"Three days, that's Monday, right?" Emma asked, unsure if it was Friday or not.

Regina nodded.

"Monday it is." Emma concluded, taking the appointment card that also had Regina's personal cell phone number written on the back, just for emergencies, she reminded herself.

Just as Emma was about to leave, Regina spoke, "See you soon, Emma."

That hope that had flashed in her eyes before was back, and this time, it wasn't leaving.

May she could get better. Maybe she could be happy. Maybe she could have her happy ending, just like in the fairy tales. Emma laughed to herself at the last thought, there's no such thing as fairy tales.

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><p>AN: Hope you liked this chapter! Please review!


	3. Going Through the Motions

Undesired Help – Chapter 3 – Going Through the Motions

**A/N: I know this chapter is late, but I've been sick for the past week making it pretty much impossible to update, but I'm feeling better now. I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

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><p>Emma let out a shaky breath as she exited the doctor-in-training's office. How had she just told the woman she just met that she had thought immensely about killing herself? If the woman didn't think she was crazy before, she definitely would now.<p>

She shook her head in trying to rid herself of the thoughts she was having and went to find her brother. She found him sitting in a beanbag chair playing with Lego's. She smiled at the image before her and carefully approached Neal, not wanting to startle him.

"Done already?" He questioned, wondering why the session had lasted less than an hour.

Emma nodded, "Yeah, but I'm meeting up with her again on Monday, so by then I should have gathered up my thoughts and be able to talk about stuff." She admitted.

Neal smiled, "Thank you for doing this, Emma."

She smirked, "Did you see how hot she is? Of course I'm going to keep doing this." She laughed.

He gave her a knowing look. "Just be careful, Ems, I'd hate to see you end up hurt." He said as he led her down the hall to the elevator.

"I'm already broken, Neal, it can't get much worse than this." She stated matter-of-factly, entering the elevator after Neal.

Neal rolled his eyes, "Just promise me you'll be careful, okay?" He asked, after seeing her less than amused expression he continued, "Just to put my mind at ease." He stated pleadingly.

"Fine. I promise I'll be careful. Happy?" She grumbled.

Neal just smiled and waited for the elevator doors to open again.

Once they got back home, Emma's thoughts were once again spinning in her head, making it impossible to be aware of her surroundings. She was glad for that, if she had to hear one more fight about who gets the first helping of supper, she was going to lose her mind.

There were four of them. Emma, Neal, Ella and Killian. Emma didn't really mind Ella, except for the fact that she was _always _cleaning, Emma thought that the blonde was just trying to snoop through her stuff, although she had never caught her, she was almost positive that was the case. However, Emma absolutely despised Killian. He was always making eyes at her, trying to bed her; even though she had made it clear several times that she was _not _interested. The boy was persistent, she'd give him that.

She made her way up the stairs to the bedroom with whom she shared with Ella. She wasn't surprised to find the girl sweeping the floor when she entered.

"Stay away from my side of the room, please." Emma mumbled as she plopped herself down on the bed.

Ella huffed, "Well if I don't clean it, who will?"

Emma cocked an eyebrow, "That's the whole point." She said, finishing the conversation by rummaging through her backpack.

She remembered that Doctor Mills had given her, her cellphone number, _for emergencies only_, Emma reminded herself. She was thankful that her foster parents had at least given her a cellphone. Even if it was a decade old flip phone, she was grateful. She added the brunette doctor's number to her phone and a reminder for her appointment on Monday. She flipped her phone shut and pulled out her journal.

Yes, her journal. She would never admit to it, and she would hurt Ella if she ever told anyone, but Emma kept a journal in fear that she would forget everything that's happened to her, and she needed the constant reminder to not trust anyone because everyone turned on her eventually.

In her chicken scratch handwriting she wrote the date, and continued on with all the happenings from that day. When she was done, she signed her name and reviewed her entry from the night before. Seeing everything there in retrospect just brought back bad memories. She couldn't believe that she had felt like that just a mere ten hours ago. She couldn't believe that even now, as she was reading the printing she recognized as her own, she still felt the exact same.

Deciding that she didn't want to deal with those feelings at the moment, Emma slammed her journal shut and looked up to see that Ella was nowhere to be found.

"Emma! Get your ass down here for supper!" She heard her foster dad, Albert call her from the kitchen downstairs.

She rolled her eyes, threw her journal into her backpack and headed downstairs. When she got the kitchen she wasn't surprised to see that there was hardly any food left. She grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and scooped about half of what was left of the pasta into her bowl.

She sat down at the table next to Neal. She was actually concerned about eating at the table, because whenever they ate at the table, like a family, something was up.

"I'm sending one of you back." Albert declared as he took a swig of his now half empty bottle of beer sitting next to his own bowl.

Shock immediately plastered Emma's face. She had been here for three years. She had met Neal here. She can't be getting sent back. She hoped, with all of her might that it wasn't her, but she knew. _She _was _always_ the one getting returned.

"Who is it?" Neal asked, grabbing Emma's hand in show of support.

Albert scowled, "Emma." He stated and then continued eating like nothing had happened.

"Why?" Emma asked, partially wavering and suddenly losing her appetite.

"Because we don't want you anymore, kid. That's why." He replied.

Emma glanced over to her foster-mother who looked just as battered and beaten as the kids. Emma was pissed. Everyone in this house was scared of Albert, but she never understood why. Sure, if you defied him, or talked back, you got a smack across the face, but he was just a man. There was nothing that he could actually do to hurt them.

"This is bullshit." Emma said, standing up from her place next to Neal.

Neal tried to grab her hand to get her to sit down again, silently telling her that she was just making things worse, but instead she ripped her hand out of his and continued.

"I've been here for three years! Three fucking terrible years. I'm getting out of here in a year. You know what? Forget it. At least I'll be out of this shit hole by tomorrow. I'm not even going to defend myself to you, asshole." She finished and stormed off to her room. Leaving everyone who was sitting at the table stunned.

When she got to her room she grabbed her cellphone and practically ran to the bathroom. Dialling the one number she had saved. After three rings, she heard a voice.

"Hello?" The voice answered.

"Doctor Mills?" Emma replied, her voice wavering and her eyes threatening to spill unshed tears.

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><p><strong>AN2: Sorry for the ending. But, hopefully Emma's life will get better from here on out! Please review! Once again, I sincerely apologize for the lateness of the chapter.**


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